In this diary
by hanala
Summary: Luna ponders on what things might have been like if she had told Ron how she felt about him. Wrote this relating to my previous experiences, and am sure you guys have too.
1. Default Chapter

Author's note: I'm a huge fan of Ron/Luna fics, but can never seem to find a whole lot, so I decided to try my hand at writing my own. This is in the form of a diary entry of Luna's. Please feel free to send reviews, whether they be good or bad. I'll try to come up with more ideas for stories, but if any of you know a good Ron/Luna fanfic, please e-mail me [hannerbear at hotmail.com] I'd really appreciate it! Thanks!  
  
P.S: I have not yet figured out how to work all this HTML and formatting stuff, so bear with me if my spacing is incorrect or anything. 


	2. September 21

Chapter 1 – September 21  
  
If I could go back in time and change how things turned out, I think I might have. How did this random thought come up, you ask? Well, I was just sitting at my window, looking out at the pouring rain and thinking, when I came upon this particular memory. It was a painful memory, yes, and I hate myself for acting the way I did.  
  
I had liked him so much, and sometimes, I think he might have liked me back. But, I'll never know. I have not seen, or talked to him in five years. At times, I wonder if he'd still keep in touch with me if I had told him how I truly felt about him. If only, if only, I had taken the chance on that one, fateful day.  
  
[Flashback]  
  
King's Cross Station was filled with Hogwarts' students, eager to see their families after yet another eventful year at Hogwarts. I was, as usual, standing by myself, waiting for my father to arrive. That's when I saw him – Ronald Weasley was walking towards me, with a solemn smile plastered on his face. He smiled even more at me, and said, "Hey."  
  
I answered back in my usual manner.  
  
"Hello Ronald."  
  
"I just wanted to let you know...before I left...that you're actually a really cool girl," he grinned, and brought something out of his back pocket of his worn down jeans. "Here's a picture I had Ginny take of us while we were talking in the hallway."  
  
I looked down at the picture. It featured both of us, standing by the hidden Room of Requirements, and we were both talking and smiling like there was no tomorrow. I blushed.  
  
"Thank you Ronald," was all I could say.  
  
"No problem. Anyways, I've gotta go, mum's waiting for me. Have a good summer, and I'll see you next year!"  
  
With that, Ronald Weasley, the love of my life, turned around and started walking back to where he had come from. As I stood there staring at his retreating back, something inside of me clicked. I had to tell him how I felt. So what if I wouldn't be seeing him for two months? Better late than never, right?  
  
"Ronald!"  
  
He abruptly stopped and turned around, his eyes scanning for the voice. I ran up to him. It was now, or never. "Hey, what's up?"  
  
I found that I could not look him straight in the eye, so instead, I opted for looking down at my feet, blushing furiously.  
  
"Uh...you see...I..."  
  
I trailed off, and this must have been the first time in my entire life that I was left embarrassed and afraid of another's reaction. I shuffled my feet a little and kept stumbling over my words.  
  
"I...I...I've been meaning to tell you...I..."  
  
He looked quizzically at me, with a hint of humor twinkling in his eyes. Right then and there, I knew I couldn't do it. I couldn't bring myself to say what I had been longing to say the whole year.  
  
"I hope you have a great summer, Ronald. Please write me once in a while, okay?" I wrapped my arms around his waist (as I was too short to reach his shoulders) and gave him a tight hug, and to my delight, he hugged me back, and whispered, "You too." Then, with one last smile, he walked away, not knowing how I felt.  
  
Before I knew it, summer was over and I was once again back at Hogwarts. I was now in my 6th year, while Ronald was in his 7th. I saw him less and less as the days wore on. I saw him every once in a while during class changes, and I sneaked glances at him from the Ravenclaw table during mealtimes. Unfortunately, we slowly grew apart. We no longer had long talks in the library while Hermione and Harry were busy with their own matters. He no longer wrapped his arm around me in a protective manner whenever Malfoy and his cronies walked by. It was all so depressing.  
  
The first time I saw him with his new girlfriend, I was devastated. That should be me! I thought savagely, but had to remind myself that if I had told him how I felt, it probably could have.  
  
Days, weeks, and months flew by, until it was time for the end of another school year. Ronald would no longer be at Hogwarts...I would have to face my 7th year by myself with Ginny. I was horribly depressed, knowing I let Ronald slip away just like that, all because I never had the courage to tell him how I felt.  
  
Since that fateful day, it has been five years – five long years. I have not heard from him since, and truth be told, I don't even know if he's still alive. Oh, if only, if only, I had told him that day! Then, maybe, just maybe, he might have liked me back. We might even be married now. But that's not going to happen...all because I didn't tell him those three simple words, "I love you." 


	3. Author's note

Author's note: Well, that's it! My first ever fanfic! I hoped you liked it, even though it was short and did not have a happy ending. I got this idea from an English final exam I had to write about courage. Tell me what you think, and if you guys have any helpful suggestions on how to properly space or start a new paragraph, please tell me! I have no idea why it's not working! Thanks again, and I'll make sure to post more Ron/Luna stories. 


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